


Speaking Without Words

by court_dancer10



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: But it gets taken care of quickly, I’ll add more tags as I post chapters, M/M, some homophobic and ableist language
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-26 14:36:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17143577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/court_dancer10/pseuds/court_dancer10
Summary: Jordie Benn didn’t expect to fall for the new intern. Especially since he wasn’t exactly open about his sexuality. There’s something about Nick, though, that Jordie couldn’t help but fall in love with.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: there are some homophobic slurs as well as some slurs against a disabled character, and some mentions of blood.

“Hey, got a sec?” 

The man ignored him, not turning around from the clipboard he was studying. Jordie was slightly annoyed at being completely ignored, but tried to push the feeling down and stay calm. If he wasn’t going to listen to him, he’d take a more direct approach. 

“Excuse me,” Jordie said, tapping the guy on the shoulder to make his point. 

The man startled, almost dropping his clipboard, just managing to keep a grip on it while turning to face Jordie. 

“Sorry, man, didn’t mean to startle you, just trying to get your attention. You’re with the medical staff, right?” 

The man’s eyebrows furrowed, and he hesitated a moment to process before responding. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there. Yeah, I’m Nick, the new intern with the medical staff; what can I do for you?” 

He had an accent that Jordie couldn’t place, and he looked embarrassed for some reason. 

“I just need to get my shoulder rubbed out, if you can.”

“No problem. I’ll meet you in room three in about fifteen minutes, if that works for you?” 

“No problem, thanks, man!” 

Nick smiled at him and hurried away, blush still bright on his cheeks. Jordie shook his head in confusion but put it in the back of his mind and went to grab a Gatorade before his appointment. 

—-  
Nick was officially his favorite person. He had been a little wary at letting the intern work on his shoulder, but he couldn’t have been more pleasantly surprised. The ache that had been bothering him for a week now was completely gone, and Jordie thought he might cry from relief. 

Nick didn’t talk during the massage, except to ask him to give a thumbs up if Jordie was feeling good or a thumbs down if something was wrong, but Jordie didn’t mind the silence. 

It was only after a few more sessions that he began to suspect there was something different with Nick. He would only respond if he was looking right at you, and he sometimes had to ask people to repeat things multiple times. Maybe he just had a hard time with English; Jordie never did find out where his accent was from, and if he wasn’t a native English speaker it would make sense to rely on facial expressions and body language to fully understand what was happening. 

When Jordie asked Nick where he was from, though, he said Canada. His accent wasn’t any that Jordie had heard from a Canadian, though. And, being the idiot that he often was, he spoke without thinking, saying exactly what had been running through his mind. 

Nick flushed and stuttered, finally muttering out, “I’m deaf. My accent is because of that.” 

Jordie felt like a complete asshole. Nick was staring at the floor, refusing to meet Jordie’s eyes, and looking like he wished nothing more than that the ground would swallow him whole. Jordie took a step forward, trying to get Nick’s attention and get him to look up. When he did, Jordie made sure to keep eye contact with him while smiling apologetically. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry. I can be a jackass sometimes and don’t think before I speak, please forgive me?”

Nick smiled back, ducking his head down a bit. “It’s no big deal, most people just start treating me different after they find out, and I hate it. I’m still competent in my job and life, ya know? But as soon as people hear you have a disability they act like you’re from another universe.” 

Jordie frowned; Whoever had made Nick feel like that was on his shit list. 

“You’re the only person who has been able to get my shoulder to stop bugging me, you definitely don’t need to defend your competence level. I’m sorry people are shitty though,” he hesitated, wondering, “ Have I ever treated you weird? If I’ve done something to offend you please, tell me, so I can apologize and never do it again.” Just the thought of upsetting Nick caused Jordie’s heart to plummet into his stomach. 

Nick just smiled reassuringly and put his hand on Jordie’s bicep, assuring him, “No, you’ve been amazing, actually. Definitely my favorite patient,” he added with a wink. 

Jordie’s face was probably tomato red at this point, he thought. Was Nick flirting with him? He was still touching Jordie’s arm, gently rubbing his thumb in gentle circles, seemingly unaware of what he was doing, and he had winked. That was flirting, right? God, why was Jordie so bad at this? 

“I gotta get dressed for practice, but maybe afterwards you could squeeze in an appointment for me?” That was good flirting, right? Letting Nick know he wanted to see him? 

Judging by the way Nick’s face fell, Jordie thought he probably missed the mark on that one. Fuck. 

“Yeah, sure, just meet me in room three when you’re done with everything. I gotta go, have a good practice.”

Nick was hurrying away before Jordie could even blink. Fuck, he really messed up. Okay, Jordie thought as he headed towards the locker room, attempt one didn’t go well. You’re a professional NHL player, man, step up and get with the program. You can do this! He probably looked odd, waving his hands around and mouthing to himself, but he had bigger concerns right now than if his teammates thought he was crazy.  
—-  
Jordie was on fire on the ice. He was blocking shots left and right, even managing to get a couple pucks past Pricey, much to the goalie’s chagrin. Of course, because the universe has a cruel sense of humor, his good mood didn’t last for long. He knew from the moment Domi skated up next to him by the boards that his mood was quickly going to turn sour. Domi, as was usual, did not disappoint in being an asshole. 

“So, saw you talking to the new trainer. You know he’s deaf, right? Total retard. I asked him to get me a new brace for my knee and he just stared at me like he was stupid. Took me three times before he finally caught on. He’s a fag, too. Checked out his Facebook, idiot doesn’t even have it on private. He’s got pictures of him kissing some guy all over his page. Hopefully he gets the boot soon, eh?” Domi laughed, knocking his shoulder into Jordie’s. 

Jordie saw red. He didn’t like Domi on a good day, but this was going too far, even for him. He shook off a glove, snatching the front of Domi’s jersey and yanking him closer, standing up to his full high to tower over him. Domi’s eyebrows rose, but he didn’t back down. 

“Shut the fuck up, asshole. Nick is amazing at his job and smarter than your sorry ass could ever dream of being. Use a slur ever again and I’ll fuck your face up even more,” Jordie growled. 

Domi had the audacity to laugh, not even looking a little ashamed. “Sounds like someone’s got a crush. What, you a fag, too?” 

Domi didn’t have time to laugh before Jordie was shaking off his other glove and landing a punch straight to Domi’s nose. Domi swore, getting his gloves off and swinging back at Jordie. Jordie had the height advantage, but he had never been a fighter. He didn’t care, though. He put all of the rage he was feeling into the punches, and Domi couldn’t keep up. Eventually Domi fell, blood dripping from his face. Jordie, who had narrowly avoided falling, looked down and sneered before spitting out, “wanna say more stupid shit? Cuz I’ll gladly kick your ass again.” 

He skated off, noticing for the first time the shocked expressions of his teammates around him. Everyone knew he was the most level headed guy around, and none of them had expected him to swing at a teammate, which is probably why no one tried to stop him. Only Price and Weber had been standing close enough to hear what Domi had said, and both had matching expressions of anger on their faces. Jordie didn’t know if it was because of what Domi said or because Jordie had bloodied one of their best players, but he didn’t care enough to stick around a find out.

Domi was already in the training room, getting stitched up and checked out, and Jordie headed off the ice, too, storming into the locker room and throwing his gear off in anger. He took the quickest shower of his life, and when he got back Nick was waiting for him, arms crossed and eyebrow raised. 

“Heard you got into a fight. Probably not the smartest thing to do when your shoulder is already messed up.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not about to sit around and let people insult you or anyone else, so sue me.” 

Nick’s stance loosened up, and he looked at Jordie with a confused tilt to his head. 

“What do you mean, you won’t let people insult me? Is that really what you got in a fight over? Let me guess, he said something about me being deaf, right?” 

Jordie flushed, avoiding Nick’s knowing, and slightly angry, gaze. “He was also talking shit about you apparently being gay,” Jordie muttered. 

Nick scrubbed a hand over his face, taking a deep breath before looking at Jordie. 

“Look, I appreciate you wanting to defend me or whatever, but I’m not a kid. I’ve heard this shit my entire life, and I’m not worth getting into a fight with your teammate. What happens if they scratch you? Or worse, decide you’re a liability and trade you? What then, Jordie?” 

Jordie stood up to his full height again, glaring at Nick. “It doesn’t matter if you’ve heard every insult in the book. I’m not going to stand by and let people insult you. And, for your information, I don’t appreciate being called a fag. I’m so sick of hearing that shit on the ice. Why should it fucking matter if I like guys? If the team wants to scratch me or trade me or whatever the fuck they’re going to do because I defended you, me, and every other gay and deaf person out there, then that’s fucking fine. I have no interest in playing for a team that supports the shit he was saying.”

Jordie was breathing heavily, realizing too late that the entire team, minus Domi, were standing quietly in the locker room. From the looks on most of their faces, they had heard most, if not all, of the argument between him and Nick. 

Before Nick could respond, Jordie jerked his head towards the door, letting Nick know they had an audience. Nick flushed, not having been prepared to come out to an entire room of hockey players who could definitely beat him black and blue if they wanted to. 

Finally, Shea stepped forward, glancing at Jordie with an unreadable expression before turning to Nick. 

“Hey, Nick, not be rude, but we’re kicking all non-players out. I think it’s time we had a meeting as a team.”

Nick nodded, making a quick exit and looking grateful for the excuse to leave. Jordie watched him go before gathering his courage and turning around to face the team. They were all standing more or less where they had been when he first noticed them. Only Pricey had moved, going to his stall to begin stripping his pads off. 

“So how much did you hear?” Jordie asked, cutting straight to the point.

“Pretty much all of it,” Shea replied. “I heard what Max said on the ice, too.” 

This was the moment Jordie knew would be coming. He was going to be told that he needed to keep his mouth shut, don’t cause trouble, and if he couldn’t keep from spreading his gay around he was going to have to leave. 

Instead, Weber glances back at the team, motioning for them to sit in their stalls. Once everyone was settled and paying attention, Shea started pacing, making sure to look every guy in the eyes as he spoke. 

“Let’s get one thing straight. We’re not going to stand for this shit. I don’t care if you hate people who are gay or not. You will fucking respect every person here, and if you say even one thing about someone’s sexuality, race, gender, religion, or disability, I will find out, and you will not like the consequences. We are a team. Act like one. If you have an issue with any of what I’ve said, come talk to me privately. Our organization has been intolerant in the past, but that’s over. We are not going to be the Habs that didn’t support each other. Figure it the fuck out, boys. Benn, don’t go anywhere. You and Domi have a meeting with coach and me in fifteen minutes.” 

Shea gave each person one more look, then started stripping off his gear and heading to the showers. The rest of the guys following him, only a couple looking irritated with what had just happened. 

Jordie was shocked. He had expected to, at best, be told to shut up, fit in, and hide his sexuality. He never expected that the team might actually accept him and his sexuality. 

Better not to get my hopes up too soon, he reminded himself. He still had the meeting with coach, and probably management at some point. At least they’d fired Bergevin. He would’ve traded Jordie for a sack of potatoes in an instant. 

He figured it was better to be early than late, so he headed out of the locker room towards coach’s office, trying to keep himself calm and not panic. He needed to go in there, stand strong, and give them no reason to doubt his story. He had every right to punch Domi’s lights out, and he wasn’t sorry that he had. 

He took one more calming breath, and knocked on coach’s door, waiting for the okay to come in. Coach called him in immediately, and Domi was already there, stitches in his face and bruises beginning to form already. Jordie took a seat as far away from him as he could, and Shea came in right as Jordie was getting settled and quickly closed the door and took the seat between the other two players. 

Coach cleared his throat, leaning forward in his chair and folding his hands on top of his desk. “So, who wants to start? Jordie? Since you were the first one to throw punches, how about you tell me why the hell you’re fighting your teammate.”

“I was defending myself and one of the trainers. Domi used some slurs to refer to myself and the trainer in question. I told him not to say it again, but he didn’t listen, kept going, so I swung.” 

Coach narrowed his eyes at Jordie but nodded, turning to Domi for his side of the story. 

“I was just making a joke. I didn’t realize he would take it the way he did, and I regret saying it, honestly. I never meant to offend anyone,” Domi pleaded. 

Coach sat back, folding his hands under his chin and looking between the two players before settling his gaze on the captain. 

“Weber, what’s your take on this incident?” 

“We had a locker room meeting, sir. I heard the exchange between the two on the ice, and I made it extremely clear to the rest of the team that we don’t stand for that sort of thing. I don’t think there’s any excuse for using the slurs that Max did. Jordie made it very clear before he got physical that what Max was saying was unacceptable, and I find it hard to believe that he thought it was a joke after that.” 

Domi’s face, Jordie was pleased to note, was turning red and he was scowling. Clearly he had expected the captain to back him up, and was not at all happy that it was not happening. 

Coach nodded, still looking between the players. “I have a meeting with management in fifteen minutes. I suggest you go home and stay off of social media. Benn, get that shoulder worked on before you leave.” 

All three players stood, filing out the door. Shea and Domi headed towards the locker room to grab their stuff and leave, but Jordie veered off down the hallway that would lead to the training rooms. As expected, he found Nick sitting in room three, working on something on his computer. 

Jordie wasn’t sure how to get Nick’s attention. He was facing the opposite direction, so he couldn’t see the door. Shrugging, Jordie walked over to Nick and gently placed his palm on the man’s back, hoping not to startle him this time. Nick seemed to be waiting for him, immediately spinning around in the chair and standing up. 

“How was the meeting?”

Jordie shrugged. “Not sure. Captain backed up my story, but coach is meeting with management to discuss what to do. Won’t know for a while what they’re gonna do to us, probably.”

Nick frowned, but didn’t say anything more. He gestured to the massage table, silently telling Jordie to go sit down. 

“What’s your pain rating in your shoulder?” Nick asked, pulling up his rolling chair to sit in front of Jordie. 

“Not bad. Maybe a four?”

Nick nodded, scribbling something down on his clipboard before looking up again. “Any stiffness or sharp pain?” 

“Little stiff, but that’s it.”

“Good. Anything else hurt or feel off that you need me to check out?”

“Nothing jumps out.”

Nick nodded, standing up and putting his clipboard face down on the chair. “Go ahead and lay down. Give me a thumbs down if anything doesn’t feel right.”

Jordie smiled at him before laying face down and arranging himself comfortably. 

Nick’s hands were magical. All of the stiffness that had set in from the stress of the day melted away, leaving his muscles feeling warm and relaxed. He felt himself drifting off and didn’t fight it. Sleep hadn’t been an easy thing to come by lately, and he was going to take any opportunity to rest that he could.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a little shorter than the last one, but I hope you like it!

Jordie wasn’t sure how much later it was when he woke up, but he could tell that he had been pretty deeply asleep. His shoulder was also, miraculously, completely pain free. He sat up, stretching his arms above his head. Pulling his shirt back into place he turned and noticed Nick for the first time. He was frozen in place, blushing slightly and staring at where Jordie’s shirt had ridden up. 

Jordie walked over to Nick, gently cupping his face in one hand. Nick looked up into Jordie’s eyes, silently questioning what was happening. 

“I might be reading things wrong, and if I am tell me, but it seems like you’re interested in me in more than a friendly way,” Jordie said softly. 

Nick blushed even darker, closing his eyes before nodding. “Yeah, I am. I can be completely professional, though. It’s not going to cause any issues with that.” 

“What if I don’t want it to be completely professional?”

Nick looked like someone had smacked him. His mouth was hanging open, and Jordie could see the wheels turning in his mind. 

“You- but- what? What?”

Jordie laughed, moving so that both of his hands were gently cupping Nick’s face. 

“Nick, I really like you. I know it’s kinda soon,” Jordie shrugged, “but I already have strong feelings for you, and I’d love to take you on a date.”

Nick still looked flabbergasted, but eventually a smile took over his face, and he nodded as much as he could with Jordie’s hands still holding him. 

“I’d really like that.”

Jordie’s face lit up. “Yeah? Would it be okay if I kissed you now?”

Nick nodded his consent, and Jordie leaned down the distance to Nick’s height and gently kissed him. Nick couldn’t do anything but hold on. Jordie was kissing him so sweetly, so gently, and Nick had never had this. He never wanted it to end. 

It did, eventually, have to end, but Jordie only pulled back far enough to rest their foreheads against each other. He was saying something, but Nick couldn’t see his lips to figure out what. He pulled back, smoothing down the crease between Jordie’s eyebrows as he did. 

“I can’t read your lips when we’re that close,” he explained. 

Jordie looked guilty, and couldn’t believe he hadn’t realized that. 

“Shit, I’m so sorry. I just said ‘wow,’” he explained. 

“Don’t worry about it, it’s a new situation and I don’t expect you to be perfect,” Nick assured him. 

Jordie was quiet, just looking at Nick and thinking. 

“Is reading lips hard?” He finally asked. 

Nick pursed his lips, thinking before he answered. 

“Sometimes. It helps if I know the person and talk to them a lot, cuz I can figure out how they shape words.”

“Do you… I’m sorry if this is rude or anything, but do you use sign language to talk to people? Is it easier?” 

Nick looked surprised. “Yeah, I use ASL. It’s easier to talk that way, but since most people don’t know it I’ve adapted.” 

Jordie looked thoughtful but didn’t say anything else, just nodding and pulling Nick into a hug. They stood there like that for a while before finally letting go and heading out. It had been an eventful day, and Jordie was more than ready to go home.  
—-

It didn’t take long for Jordie to learn some simple signs. He found some online classes and signed up for those, too. He was determined to become fluent in sign language, but for now the basics would suffice. 

Nick was nowhere to be found when Jordie got to the the rink the next day, but Jordie could be patient. They had a game tonight, and he needed to get his head in the right space. He was pulled out of his preparations when one of the trainers came to get him, pulling him into the coach’s office before quickly retreating. 

“I’m sure you’re wondering why you’re here, so let’s just get straight to it,” coach started. “I talked with management at length, and we cannot condone physical violence between teammates, no matter what the reason. While I don’t blame you for what you did, we have to set a precedent for other players. You’ll be a healthy scratch tonight. Go home, you’re not joining the team for morning skate. Be back here for the game.” 

Jordie was fuming. He should’ve seen this coming. God, how fucking naive could he get? Of course they would punish him for this shit. No organization benches a player after a fight, and Jordie knew exactly why he was being sat out, and it had nothing to do with management trying to ‘set a precedent’ against fighting. 

Coach looked like he knew exactly what Jordie was thinking, but there was nothing left for him to say. He didn’t like the situation any more than Jordie did, and he was sure most of the team would be up in arms when they found out. There wasn’t much that he could do when the GM made up his mind, though. 

Jordie slammed his way into the locker room, not caring about the scene he was making and the attention that was now on him. He ignored everyone, snatching his coat and making sure he had his keys and phone before storming back out. Coach would tell them what had happened. Jordie wasn’t about to do it for him. 

It was just his luck that he ran into Nick, literally, on his way out the door. His arms shot out automatically to catch the smaller man before he could fall, but quickly let go as soon as he was steady. Nick could tell something was wrong by the look on Jordie’s face, but the hockey player had stormed off before Nick could say anything. 

“Jordie! Wait!” 

Nick took off after him, catching his arm and trying to get him to turn around. Jordie stood firm, though, refusing to let Nick move him. 

“What happened? Shouldn’t you be on the ice right now?” 

Jordie finally turned around, and Nick flinched at the pure anger that stared back at him. 

“No. I got fucking scratched for the fight yesterday. No morning skate, no game. I’m not even allowed to stay and work out. Can I fucking leave now?”

Nick took back the hand that had been resting on Jordie’s arm, and he looked so scared and upset that Jordie immediately felt horrible for snapping at him. 

“Fuck, Nick, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell. I’m just so fucking frustrated with this and you caught me right at the wrong time. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you, I’m sorry,” he signed the last two words as he said them, trying to show Nick how much he meant those words. 

Nick’s eyes filled with tears, and Jordie was terrified that he had done something wrong. He was sure he had gotten the sign right, but maybe not. He started to apologize again, but Nick waved him off, pulling him into a hug and burying his face in the space between Jordie’s neck and shoulder. 

“No one’s cared enough to learn sign language for me. My parents don’t even know it. I can’t believe you learned that.”

Jordie’s heart felt like it was breaking to pieces. Nick deserved everything good, but it seemed like no one cared. Jordie would change that, though. He gently cupped the back of Nick’s head, tangling his fingers gently in the soft strands. They stood there for a few minutes until Nick slowly pulled his head back, smiling softly at Jordie.

“Thank you. You don’t even know how much it means to me that you learned that,” Nick whispered.

Jordie wrapped his arms around Nick’s waist, gently pulling him in to press a sweet kiss to his lips. 

“I want to learn. I want to be able to talk to you without you having to work so hard,” Jordie said when they finally pulled apart. 

The moment was quickly ruined when a car door slammed shut, and the two broke apart, realizing that they were out in the open, and anyone could walk by and see them. Nick looked at his watch, blanching when he saw what time it was.

“I’m so sorry, but I have to run. I should’ve been in there five minutes ago,” he explained quickly.

Jordie nodded, the reality of the day settling back into his mind. Nick had a job to do, and Jordie needed to leave before coach found out that he was still there. He gave Nick one more kiss, unable to resist. Nick smiled at him before turning and jogging into the building, leaving Jordie to stare after him.  
—-

The game that night was miserable. Not only was Jordie stuck in the press box with Domi, who had also been a healthy scratch, but the team was getting their asses handed to them by the Bruins. When the final buzzer finally signaled the end of their humiliation, Jordie was ready to rip his beard out. It was bad enough that they had been beaten by their rivals while he could do nothing but watch, but to top it off, they got shut out, six to zero. 

He went to the locker room for the speech coach gave, which was pretty much just him screaming at them about how shitty they had been. This was, thankfully, the last night before their bye week, and they would all be able to take their minds off of hockey for a while. Jordie was going down to Dallas to see his brother for a couple of days while the Stars had a row of home games, and his flight was leaving in only a few hours. He didn’t want to leave without seeing Nick, though. He was in the medical office, finishing up a few notes on his computer when Jordie walked in.

“Hey,” Jordie said when he finally had Nick’s attention.

“Hi. Not that I’m not happy to see you, but don’t you have a flight to catch soon?” Nick asked.

“Yeah, I’m leaving straight from here. I just wanted to say bye. And I kinda realized that I don’t actually have your number, and was hoping maybe we could fix that?” Jordie could feel himself blushing. He never had been the smoothest person around.

Nick just smiled and pulled his phone out of his pocket, poking around on it until he handed it to Jordie with a new contact page pulled up. Jordie quickly typed his number in, saving it and sending himself a text so that he’d have Nick’s number, too.

“There. Now I can talk to you when my brother’s annoying the hell out of me,” Jordie joked.

Nick laughed, a beautiful sound, if Jordie did say so himself. He glanced back to make sure the door was closed before pulling Jordie down into a kiss. He pressed himself as close to the taller man as he could, winding his arms around his neck and deepening the kiss. Jordie groaned, clutching at Nick’s waist as if it were a lifeline. Nick pulled back far too soon, and grinned at the shell shocked look on Jordie’s face.

“Now you won’t forget me while you’re on vacation,” Nick joked.

“No chance of that happening,” Jordie replied, completely serious. 

Nick smiled at him before swatting him gently and moving him towards the door.

“Go on, get out of here or you’re going to miss your flight.”

Jordie grumbled at him but made his way to the door, turning around once again before opening it so that he could lean down and press one more kiss to Nick’s lips. 

“I’ll see you soon.”

“Text me when you land. Have a good time with your brother.” 

Nick gave him one last gentle shove, and the smile didn’t leave Jordie’s face the entire plane ride to Dallas.

**Author's Note:**

> I love Jordie, and he needs more happiness in his life. 
> 
> Feel free to leave comments/suggestions/things you’re dying to see!


End file.
